There are days, especially like today that I wish I was the type of person that truly didn’t care to understand people, situations and why things happen. But that’s not me. I am a worrier, I need to understand and most things in life just can’t be explained or at least not when they are happening.
My kids are now 17, 15, and 8. Like most parents I worry, I worry a lot. We live in a crazy world where people walk into nursing homes and randomly shoot people, fathers kill their own children to spite their mother, mothers kill their own babies and children are abused. And that’s not even scratching the surface of crazy that is our world.
I am constantly talking to my kids about life and the importance of choices. What may seem like something harmless/silly/worth the risk – can have the potential to affect you for the rest of your life. Maybe even alter your life completely in the blink of an eye.
All this is to say, my son’s best friend “Jason” was arrested last night. And now he’s facing many years in jail. He’s only 18. Unfortunately my husband and I saw it coming with the path he was heading in. I feel angry, I feel sad and selfishly I feel grateful that my son wasn’t with him when he made the stupid choices he made.
This is a child that I always refer to as my adopted son, who calls me Mom. I have driven him to the movies, to the mall, to get a haircut… more times than I can count. His Mom is very sickly so she isn’t as involved in his life as I am sure she wishes she could be.
This isn’t his first time in trouble. It’s his third time. One of those times my husband and I helped him, despite our better judgment, to give him a chance to right his wrong. But in the end, it didn’t matter - he again made a bad choice. A choice that will likely cost him a lot…
Jail changes people (never been arrested myself but hey, I watch TV like the best of them. Oz anyone?) He will never be the same. My son has been sad all day. I have been sad all day and so has his poor mother. If only he had realized how many people care about him and how just one stupid incident that he didn’t think through could change his life.
And you can bet my son will be going to visit him in jail. There are plenty of other things that I am having a hard time understanding right now but I will save those for another night and possibly a new blog!
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
I am so sorry you guys have to go through this with him. It’s good that you are all there to care about this kid and help his mom through it though. I imagine this is really hard on her. I would imagine she feels helpless being sick and not able to do a lot of things, especially in a situation where her child needs her support.
I hope that he gets the help he needs while he’s in jail and doesn’t just fall through the cracks and come out worse for the wear.
That’s tough… I’m sorry that anyone has to go through that. My husband got a DUI a couple months ago… I can somewhat relate… sadly, it hasn’t changed him for the better. I wish your son’s friend the best… and you all the strength to help him.